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Designated Zebra

A drink-driving arrest turned into an animal affair when two of the passengers that an intoxicated motorist was putting in harm’s way was his pet zebra and macaw.

Police made the unusual arrest when a passerby reported seeing a zebra and a macaw sitting in a pick up …

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Watch Out For Threesomes

Two lovers who beat a woman with a riding whip when they caught her trying to steal a wristwatch during a threesome have been locked up.

Aaron Samuels, 27, and Brooke Reid, 22, continued to pleasure each other as they took turns to torture the terrified 21-year-old victim during …

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Girl on Girl Punch Drunk Love

A man faces trial for assault and resisting police after police say he turned violent when his fiancée kissed another woman.

John Vincenti, 40, of Ferndale was ordered Thursday to stand trial in Oakland County Circuit Court following a preliminary examination before Ferndale 43rd District Judge Joseph Longo.

Police were …

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Stay In The Ride Till It Has Come To A Complete Stop

A man bailed from a moving vehicle early Sunday morning, following a quarrel with his girlfriend, Phoenix Police said.

A news release from Sgt. Tommy Thompson said something sparked off an argument between the 27-year-old man and his girlfriend as they traveled north on 7th Avenue near Bethany …

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All Tied Up And Nowhere To Ho

What does a guy have to do to get some anonymous sex these days?

Last week, Ramsey, Minn. police say, Alan Petrusson tied himself to a tree, put a blindfold on, exposed his genitals and waited for anonymous sex near a public park, according to CBS Minnesota.

“It’s the weirdest …

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Macy’s Is Now Selling Vagina For $40

Hey, dudes: Memorial Day, arguably the most romantic holiday of the year (although Arbor Day and International Tuba Day are also conducive to getting your f#ck on), is fast approaching, and it is time for you to select a gift for the lady in your life.

What better gift …

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Dude…. Where’s My Van

Tall grass and weeds were to blame for a stolen vehicle report earlier this week.

A 78-year-old Dacula woman called police on May 14 to report that her deceased husband’s 1973 Chevrolet van was missing. The woman said the van, which is inoperative, had been parked in the front …

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Reward For Missing iPhone Is An Ass Kicking

A 53-year-old woman in Fredericksburg, VA was just minding her own business when she spotted an unclaimed iPhone near a 7-Eleven convenience store on Lafayette Boulevard, reports NBC Washington.

As any good samaritan would attempt (seriously, there isn’t enough people who will do what she did), she tried to contact the …

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I Said More Onions!!!!

Incensed about the “messed up” cheeseburgers they purchased at a McDonald’s drive-thru window, two Tennessee men allegedly returned to the fast food joint and vandalized it, cops report.

The peeved patrons were apparently set off by the paucity of onions on their cheeseburgers.

According to a Murfreesboro Police Department report, …

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Yeah, I’m Here To Pick Up My Drugs


When a customer of Giant Eagle supermarket on Washington Road in McMurray found a black bag Tuesday, nothing appeared out of the ordinary.The unidentified customer turned the bag over to Giant Eagle managers, who then called Peters Township police.

Inside the bag, police found an undetermined amount of marijuana, …

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